Jeffw's Blog

Get OUT of my pub!

Just joking, WELCOME! Here, you'll find some short fiction stories, anecdotes and my possible grumpy opinion on pretty much everything and anything. As you didn't in the slightest asked for it and because I can be magnanimous, I'll try to wrap it all in a clever cocktail of sarcastic witticism and stylish dark humour of the latest fashion, under the icy sophistication of which, you'll discern my true cry of despair to witness our world going to pot... or maybe it's just something I ate.
Don't hesitate to leave a comment! Thanks you, come again.

Caution MAY CONTAIN STRONG LANGUAGE AND HAZARDOUS PUNCTUATION... and with a bit of luck, some English too.

Saturday, 5 November 2011

Insignificant Morning Ritual

Let me introduce you to Mr. Rupert Ruthford III. You will probably meet him again.

Rupert's day started like any other day.
After cooking their breakfast and sending the children on their way to school, he was standing in the kitchen, busy preparing his pack lunch before leaving for work. One sandwich – brown bread, two slices, margarine on one, mayonnaise light on the other, ham, one slice, lettuce, two leaves – and one apple, peeled and pre-cut in quarters, as usual. In the process, he was sipping, absent-mindedly, his weak white decaffeinate coffee with, as it was his birthday, one sugar, lost in no particular thoughts.
His wife, Bernadette – who's parents wanted a boy and weren't far off the mark – was still upstairs, having a lay-in, like every Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday. On Sunday, she would generally indulge in a longer one, followed by a nap.
Today, she would eventually rise and carry on with her mysterious daily routine. Rupert never dwelled upon what she could fill her time with... Rupert never dwelled upon much.

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